The (In)Visibility of Race

Three months. Around three months i have been abandoning this blog. Of course, there should be millions things to say during that time. Yet, life has been pretty hectic as i was preparing for my last semester. I've done most part of it. How do i feel? Relief of course but I didn't relish every moment of it. The pressure was far too big to handle. Fear of failure was haunting me and made it even harder to complete a simple thing. I used to be able to write an essay in a week without any problem or finished 4 different essays in a month. But last year, there was a moment where i could not write anything. I didn't even go through beyond my readings. They felt like unpenetrable. Finally, I've done it. It took me nearly 9 years to finish my undergraduate degree but now i am officially graduated. But i am not yet finish in dealing with uni. I am taking up a challenge to do honours this year. I believe this could be the final.

Speaking of uni, there is one thing that always bewilders me. Often i saw students with 'coloured skin' playing around with computers in the study room. They were checking their facebook profile, chatting in YM or MSN or browsing anything that is entirely not for the study purposes. I asked myself, is it always like this? Do they know that these computers are provided for academic purposes? Soon i was aware that there is a racial undertone in my thought. No doubt, students with dominant colour, which is white, were also pissfarting around with computers. But why did i pick up the coloured ones?

After pondering this issue, i came to the conclusion that the more dominant a certain race is, the more invisible it becomes. As opposed to the invisibility of white skin, the coloured skin becomes so visible. Whatever these coloured skin people do, it is always noticeable. Every time i see them doing something 'unusual', i began to be annoyed. Of course, i also complain if there are people with white skin doing something similar to the coloured ones. But what fascinates me more is the fact that i am not white but i am picking up more coloured skin. This is perhaps because i perceive the whole whiteness including culture and colour as something unquestionably dominant. So i am passing as white: acting and thinking like them as a way of accepting the 'truth' of white power, more importantly, in order to be seen invisible.

But taking this further, this is not all about who is right and who is wrong. Coloured skin people is also contributing to the invisibility of white. For instance, coloured skin people are proud of having such exotic cultures and to large extent believe that white has no culture. However their ideas of uniqueness and exoticness of their cultures are built upon the perception that white has no culture. By accepting this, the invisibility of white becomes more pronounced as much as the visibility of skin colour.

Of course, it is absolutely bollocks if we say that white has no culture. White has cultures as much as others races do. But in the past, there was an exoticisation of other races and cultures through colonisation which made non-whiteness exotic and different. Wacko scientists such as anthropologists travelled across the continent from the metropole and went back home, bringing stories of these exotic people. When in the end, people moved from the colonies to the metropole, to large extent, people are seeing other cultures with the exotic paradigm deriving from colonial construct. Meanwhile, these 'exotic people' soon start to enjoy being the object of gaze but at the same time begin to act like white and learn the advantage of being invisible.

When a pole meets a hole

About five years ago I had a theory about penis and males’ domination. Generally, some blokes in the corner of the street will probably think that men are more powerful than women. Their belief comes from the distinctively different features that men and women have. You all have known that this sort of crazy idea prevailed in the past. All great thinkers even thought the same way. Daniel Defoe once wrote about the difference in gender role between men and women and was seen it as something natural.

My theory was that the shape of penis and its function in the sexual intercourse made men aware of their social position. Let me elaborate this further. During intercourse, penis will penetrate vagina. This activity reflects on how men are exercising their power of penetrating women’s territories. Vagina, on the other hand, has a role as receiver, opening itself up to be penetrated by penis. No matter what kind of position that couples have, penetration is the key. So the shape of penis which is long and fits the role of penetration and this role is manifesting at social and cultural realm.

I am fully aware that the flaw of this theory is in the over emphasis on the heterosexual relation. It also begs the question of when do men begin to be conscious about the shape of their penises and their perception on males’ social and cultural roles. I am not an expert of psychoanalysis but somehow when I thought of this, the image of Freud might have come into my mind.

While the shape of penis and its impact on subjectivity isn’t appealing anymore to me, penetration still gets me fascinated, nevertheless. In most sex, penetration is generally practiced. If there is no cock, finger or dildo will certainly do the job. But why is penetration? Can people have sex without involving penetration either with penis, finger, or dildo? I truly believe that people can do it without penetration. Yet, the answer that I am after is not whether people can do it or not. Rather, I am interested to know whether the concept of penetration in sexual activity might relate to the prevailing notion of heteronormative culture. Well one has a hole and the other has a pole and it seems to be natural, doesn't it?

Same sex relationships, to some extent, exist to contest the hegemonic idea of heterosexuality. And if their relationships mean to challenge heterosexual relationship then can it be said that penetration in same-sex relationship could arguably mean as nothing as perpetuating heterosexual culture. Should there be creativity in defining the role of a hole than something penetrable? And for a pole, it could be more challenging to use it without thrusting it into a hole, whatever hole it might be. The role of dildo in lesbian sex, for example, is puzzling but also interesting. Although the fake penis implies the presence of man in lesbian sex, its presence is pretty much controlled and defined by two women. The penis belongs to no men but them and this means disempowered. Despite the absence of a real man in lesbian relationship, penetration using the dildo does not challenge the seemingly natural role of a hole and pole.

Snippet from a countryside

I just came back from holiday in Buckland Valley near Bright. The mesmerising view of snow-capped mountain, chestnut trees and vineyard are breathtaking. The place where i was staying is also offering a relaxing experience in a very different way: fireplace, a proper espresso machine, plasma TV, comfortable king size bed, and L'Occitane body care products. All of these modern stuffs give you a huge sense of familiarity of urban luxurious life. Yet, fresh and clean air, the bush and the farms send constant reminders of how far away i was from a familiar and modern urban life.

The Bright itself sucks, i must say. It is a small town in which its busyness owes much from tourists who want to go for skiing or just playing in the snow. However, i am not saying that all small towns have nothing to offer. There are few good places to eat at Bright. Simone's has a raving review in several culinary and travel mags and website. It is Italian-inspired dish and i didn't go as having driven three hours from Melbourne only to find Italian food is not really adventurous. What i expected is a sort of rustic country-style food which use local produce. Not far away from Bright there is a small town called Milawa in which their local produce could lure Nigella Lawson to include Milawa into her retirement plan. Their cheeses are fantastic! It has also a small olive shop which sells variety of olive products. Of their products, the winner is, i think, a small olive marinated with lemon and orange zest. Some wineries are also located in Milawa and the big one is Brown Brothers.

Speaking of wine, i fail to understand how people become a wine aficionado. It requires a highly sensitive palate to be such an expert who is able to describe the structure of wine. These days many people in my generation have been grown up with packaged foods such as fish fingers and take away. Surely, preservative and flavour enhancers we have consumed can cause calluses on our tongue. When i stopped at the winery and saw people testing the wine, i wasn't impressed at all. About four people surrounded the table and each had a glass of wine in their hands. They sniffed, looked at the colour, and swirled the glass before take a good sip. You can blame my philistine tongue for my failure to tell the difference between Merlot and Cabaret Sauvignon. To me these people are no more than glorified pissheads. As internet connection become more accessible, it probably takes few hours for people to bluff about their expertise on wine. Just perusing wikipedia before testing it, and careful but excessive use of adjectives, it will give people under impression that you are such a connoisseur.

The use of adjective words when describing wine is apparently very crucial. If you check the label on the bottle, at least four or five adjective words are used. When i was in this cafe at a little vineyard located in Mount Beauty, i counted how many adjective that they use in every type of wine. There is one particular type, either red or white wine i can't recall, that uses twelve adjective words! Twelve adjective in more or less than 50 words is excessive. It's like reading 14 years old's love poetry. Yet, you can't call it cheesy with wine. I thought flowery words might be a trick to persuade people to buy them. However, i was gobsmacked to notice the style of writing in the book The Science and Art of Wine that i found on the studio. It's full of adjective: vibrant, elegant, smooth, silky, refreshing, intense, supple and so on.

I haven't had a long chat with these connoisseurs but would love to take the piss out of them. There was one moment i remembered but it wasn't about wine but an expert in general. A girl came to cafe where i work and asked the flavour of muffin that we sell at that time. She told me that she is a bit picky about her muffin. In my response, "So you seem to be a muffin connoisseur, why don't you write up a muffin review in a culinary mag?". This poor girl took it seriously and went on about what good muffin should be like and liked the idea of writing up a muffin review. I was laughing my head off after she disappeared from my sight. Her response to my taking-the-piss-question has a lingering finish, nevertheless.

Mt Beauty

Lake Catani

Trees recovering from bushfire at Mt Bufallo

Buckland Valley

Who Needs a Historian?

First semester has finished and that really excites me as during holiday term i can be a social creature again. Next semester will be commencing in late July and this will be my last semester before i graduate. No doubt i am very stoked about this, yet at the same time anxiety starts to step in. 'What i am gonna do next?' is the important question to which i should find the answer.

Usually i often get asked by people about my life when i told them that this year is my last year at uni. Mostly they are surprised when i told them that i am studying history and then throwing a question of what sort of job that i am going to do after this? My response will normally be beginning with 'mmmm, uh, ummm, well'. Maybe a writer, or journalist, research assistant, or could do anything different to my field. It's hard to answer this sort of question as it relates to my big plan in life and ultimately links to my being. Sometimes i wish i could say to them: Thank you very much for being concerned with my life, i was happy before you asked me 'what sort of job that i am gonna do'!

Some people suggested that i could be a teacher. I thought this idea is good but then i realised that i am interested more in the history of sexuality, which makes the idea of being teacher is bad. I can't imagine if some parents will be happy to hear from their children about what they've learnt at history class.

What did you learn today darling? Well, i learnt about fellatio in England during late 19th century mum! And guess what? Buggery was common amongst sailors but they didn't call that homosexual! Mum! Mum! Are you alright?

Most international students in Australia are seldom doing Arts degree. Engineering, commerce, science, or even hospitality are sort of majors that they are doing. Maybe i am a stupid migrant because i just follow what i like without thinking about the available opportunity in the future. Sometimes i think that i should have chosen commerce or accounting or something similar and would have been working in a big office in the city, having 9-5 routine and wearing nice suits everyday.

I really don't know what happens next. The plan is to do honours degree next year and after that i will find a job. If i am not that lucky, you might see me selling Big Issues magazine or roasted chestnut. Or i might call your home during your leisure time and offer a fantastic deal of holiday plan, or ask you random question about particular products.

Soup and stupid question

I am not sure how to describe people who say something 'stupid'. For example, it's the end of autumn and beginning of winter so the temperature is of course changing to i-can-cut-cheese-with-my-nipple degree. But why people still ask: "it's cold, isnt it". With this sort of question, i normally reply: "We call this winter here!''. Oh dear!

If you like to ask question, please choose the one that is thought-provoking and makes you think. Here are some questions that might be worth pondering:

1. Would you call it threesome if you are having sex with pre-op transsexual?

2. If sex is one of the reasons for people to have an affair, then the number of people having an affair might be low amongst swingers?

3. On a first date, would you drink wine or cocktail?

4. If women think that men always want sex, then gay couple will have sex more often than heterosexual ones.

5. If you like reading while you are in the toilet and can spend more than 20 minutes a day, how many jumper/sweater can you knit within three months?

6. Why people always respond "bless you" when you are sneezing but rarely say anything when you are coughing (sometimes they ask: are you alright?)?

Anyway winter is coming and it means soup time. I love making soup and potato and leek is the champion in my view. Surely, pumpkin is still an old-fave but not mine.

Little Turbulence

Shit hits the fan at work. The owner declared bankrupt two nights ago and the business has been taken over since his business went on liquidation. Everyone was shocked, particularly those who trusted the former boss. I am not particularly surprised as i knew this moment was coming anytime soon. But what surprised me is that so much debt were unpaid, including staff wages. The good side is that we are employed again--although technically our jobs were terminated for a minute. Soon after the meeting has done, we went out to talk about this. As it might happen everywhere, there is always one person who thinks that she/he has the most important and juicy goss and is getting choosy with which she/he should share this juicy goss. Be fuckin careful, you might not be able to keep it from dripping if it is too juicy!

My former boss is an arrogant prick! He likes doing everything his way no matter what the consequence might follow from doing it his way. His coffee is utterly shite but insisted on working behind the coffee machine. Fast is the key, forget about quality. Well, dumb arse will easily see the difference between crappuccino and cappuccino, won't they?

His social intelligence is far from excellence by any standard. Three marriage failure can prove this 'thesis' on his social skill.

I've never been a huge fan of him. I always see my former boss, or any boss in general, as business partner. Some of my friends who trusted him so much were baffled. How could he do that? asked them. I really don't know. Shouldn't they know better than me given good relationship that they have, in which personal judgement can be made about his personality?

Last week i wasn't given enough shift, so i have little to lose. But some of my workmates heavily rely on last week paid to pay their life expenses. I told them that i would not call myself 'lucky' in this situation as it is inappropriate. I don't think the hierarchy of luckiness can be applied in this kind of situation. It's messy! Fuckin messy!

I have been looking for a new job as i can't work with some of my workmates. It is not because i am socially appalling or like to bitch. Rather i have huge doubt in their quality as team player. Yet at work, tension often comes from people inability to differentiate personal judgement on work quality and personal attitude. I will be happy to hear someone saying to me: ''you are such a lovely person and i like to hang out with you, but as a team player it's absolutely hopeless".

Anyway it's all over!

Lullaby for Insanity

"Having children is selfish. It's all about maintaining your genetic line at the expense of the planet", Toni Vernelli.

Some of you might have been familiar with the quoted line above. Who can't forget Tony Vernelli who bragged about her sacrifice of maternal need for the environment. Who can't hold their cringe when a Brit whose apperance on the news once may have made you choked on your dinner or spil your hot chocolate on the couch, or shattered your date plan and replaced it with a raging debate on baby and environment.

I know that her story is not new anymore. Yet, the controversy that she threw is something that really hard for people to get over it, at least for a year. Delving into her thinking, there is a benign idea laying underneath her inarticulate words. It's all about our planet. No one can deny that our poor planet needs to be taken care of. And solutions should be quickly found in order to save our planet and maintain the sustainability. I definitely concur!

I will express no objection to those who like to start from themselves. I commend people who like having veggie patch than buy them at supermarket. I am very much respect for those who are carefully using water. Shoppers who hate plastic bag are greatly appreciated.

But not having babies due to caring for environment? Forgive me if i fail to recognise the correllation between sterilization and environment. If couples chose not to have babies because they are afraid of not being able to afford it or it is because of health or something else, i can accept that. If you sterilise yourself only because you think the increasing population will lead to environment hazard, i would then suggest you to sit down and have a thought about your logic.

What is the point if you sterilise yourself but still continue to use menstrual pads, even the recycle cotton one? Many women living in developing countries are still using washable cloth instead of disposable ones. How about you stop using toilet paper? I am pretty sure that forest in the UK is not enough to provide toilet paper. Again, washable clothes are good idea for cleaning up your bottom. Do you think that is too traditional for your 'modern' thought?
Have you ditched your food processor and replace it with mortal and pestle? How well do you understand about environmental hazard? Have you been to Papua where Freeport dumps their waste in the river where local people heavily rely on? Or instead of having exotic holiday in Africa, why don't you visit Banaba island where British company removed the whole population after they discovered large amount of phosphate?

After you have done all of these, let sit down and calculate whether small population of Banaba or Papuan will threaten our poor planet more than mining companies?

Toni darling, your idea is benign but it is only packed with the wrong gift wrap. There is an inextricable link between environmental hazard and development. This is evident in developing countries. For example, the Green Revolution might have been able to boost up agricultural development in developing countries but heavy reliant on chemical fertilizers had a serious impact on the soil.

We shall return to the link between babies and environment. We can't blame mothers who live in shanty towns but insist on having babies. Having babies are just not about maintaining genetic line but it relates to cultural practices that underpins their understanding of their existences. Don't call them selfish either if later on you see their kids on television suffer from malnutrition or die from bird flu. Although the stories of these kids might have justified your decision. I can imagine yourself having cuddle on your comfy couch with your husband and watching news from developing countries and say something like this "Oh i am so glad darling that i've chosen to sterilise myself. It is completely immoral for me to have babies and ends up suffering from malnutrition like them".

I should find a way how to celebrate the demise of humanity!!!

Skin or No-Skin

Which one better, having sex with circumcised man or not?

If we ask 100 women the question above, surely it doesn't give us a clue as to whether satisfaction can depend on the physical aspect of genital. Hypothetically, 40 women will say yes for sex with forskinned penis and the rest will say no. It is hard to justify the claim that sexual satisfaction is way much better with the skinned based on that statistic. It is like me asking 10 people to answer this question: do i look like Brad Pitt? If 7 of them nodded, i am still doubting myself if i look like him.

There is exchange of idea regarding this issue. Rachel, a writer of sexblog posted a short article under the title 'Circumcised Guys Do it Better' which gets more than thirty comments. For Rachel, uncut penis' don't look sexual or arousing as it makes her want to "pat them and tuck them back where they came from". Differing argument comes from Esther Goldberg who argues that uncircumcised men are sensitive and see foreskin akin to clitoral hood.

According to a study of urologists, there is no dissimilarity of sexual satisfaction between foreskinned and not. Both can equally enjoy sexual satisfaction. This study was conducted in Uganda, using 4500 men as samples. Half of them have their foreskin removed and the other half get them circumcised 24 months later.

There are various reasons why people want to remove or restore their foreskin. Culture is one of reason why people are wanting to get it done. A story of England-born David who migrated to USA exemplifies how does culture drives people to do it.

As an uncircumcised young man, he says, he felt awkward in gym class. "I read that being circumcised makes the penis easier to clean and less susceptible to sexually transmitted disease. I had friends in medical school telling me, 'Dude, you should do this.' " So he did. But hygiene was not the chief motivation. "I wanted to fit into American culture. When you're circumcised, there's less rejection from women," he says.

Some might have thought of hygiene as the underlying factor. It is generally accepted that there is a link between circumcision and hygiene. The removal of foreskin will look cleaner and is considered less susceptible to sexual disease. I am not sure if you go bareback and are still less susceptible. Perhaps, the helmet-look-like in the circumcised penis head suggests that it has the same function as protective helmet for bikes.

In one of largest Islam adherents country, Indonesia circumcision is very common. It might be because of the dominant religious value which rules the foreskin business. Yet this does not mean that uncircumcised men are difficult to find. There are number of people in Indonesia who don't circumcise their penises due to different cultural value. To some extent, they might see circumcision is associated with Islam. So if people get their foreskin cut because religious belief, for what reason do non-Islamic people get their skin cut? Health is one of the reason. It's been evident anywhere that discourse on sexuality and health is dominated by science and culture. So has been in Indonesia, circumcision is placed in both health reason or what their religion ask them to do.

I haven't heard anyone in Indonesia saying that circumcision could enhance male sexual performance. What i heard most is that they did it because it's for health or being a moslem. But there might be a different reason that drives kids to get their foreskin removed. Presents! Normally after being circumcised, the family will celebrate it. It's a serious feast with a proper invitation. All guest are expected to give presents to the boy who sits in the lounge with his sarong. If the boy family is wealthy enough, Play Station 3 may be sitting together in the presents corner as one of his uncle thought he deserves one. On the other hand, if his father is a pedicab driver, new un-branded shoes might be the most expensive gift he would have. But these days, i heard people giving money instead of goods. Both goods and money work fine for kids, i suppose.

Anyway i found a study on circumcision in Indonesia and it can be found here.

Back to circumcision and sex, do girls really think it matters? I haven't done a survey on this but will try to find out from my own circle first.

The Nostalgic Journey (cheesy title, i know)

After I left Sydney for a year, I went back to the city where I spent my life for the last four years. It felt great although a bit emotional when I visited some places that used to be my sphere of existence. Physically there are not much changes overall. Newtown is still the same: busy and vibrant. My old flat in Dulwich Hill is changed, however. There is serious garden happening there. Plants have been growing nicely since I left. One big tree at the backyard was chopped down. Thanks to my Scottish neighbour who spent heaps of time to do the garden. My Scottish neighbour told me that two of my old neighbours have moved out and other tenants are moving in. The rent price is predictably going up. Yet, the leap from 230 per week to 380 is such a great surprise.

Sydney Uni has been experiencing a lot of changes. Construction fences are everywhere. The new law faculty building has not finished. Last time I was there, they were demolishing the old building. Now I can see the progress happening through three floors car park. As part of this reconstruction, the new pedestrian path on Eastern Avenue looks great, particularly its size that takes over the road connected to the City Road entrance.

In general it feels weird to go back to the places where you build your existence upon it. I like to have an expectation of changes taking place there as I believe that changes signify life. But at the same time there is a slight fear of dealing with the changes. It is the fear of being unable to see myself in the past. Place and memory are connected. When some places were disappeared or rebuilt with something new, all the past moments that were associated with them have also gone. These past moments only live in our mind. This is what makes memory so precious as it can connect us to the irreversible time. Not only does it connect us to the past, but through memory we can see and understand our beings in the present.

Apart from the nostalgic journey, I managed to explore another landscape of Sydney. I went to Blue Mountain and Wottamolla National Park in the southern part of Sydney and had rejuvenating experience to see the beautiful nature up there. My favourite part is the big cliff at Wottamolla. Wottamolla is my favourite as it is located near the coast and the walk was a bit easier for it doesn’t have big steep track.

I think I remembered how it was to be in Sydney. But when I was in the city to meet up with a friend with whom I had a crush on, my recollection of being in the Sydney during peak hours seems to be wrong. It was around lunch time when the bus that took me to the city from Sydney Uni arrived at Martin Place. The city was hugely crowded: people are parading along the footpath, the cars are creeping on the road, and eating places were packed with a combination of snazzy-dressed workers, tourists, and shoppers. After I successfully crossed the traffic lights without having collided with other crossers, there was a moment for me to think of the fast pace of life in the city. I do believe that our body movement is shaped by spatial arrangement and influenced by codes that fill into that space. Soon I recognised the fast pace, my body seemed to adjust to it.

The pace of Sydney was a topic of conversation with this girl with whom I met up. We sat down on the grass at Hyde Park and talked about our life. Usually with this girl, the conversation is cerebral, involving a range of theories from Foucault to Habermas. This time, I preferred to put these verbose ideas aside and have a chat about ordinary life.

All and all, I had a great time in Sydney and would love to go back there.

View from Wottamolla National Park

Jamison Look Out-Blue Mountain

Botanical Garden

Wottamolla National Park

Knowledge is Power

It's been a month i haven't updated my blog. Uni has been commencing last month and that means i will be busy. Since 20th i have been in Sydney having holiday. Well, sort of. Although i've managed to see some interesting parts of Sydney, i can't take my fingers away from my keyboard as several essays are waiting to finish. So juggling between holiday and essays is difficult. I am happy to see Sydney again, nevertheless.

If Australians were asked one thing about the link between Australia and Sweden, we might have IKEA as an answer. Not really surprising if this Sweden gigantic furniture company is the most likely answer as many Aussies may have IKEA products in their houses and would like to spend their weekends to do window shopping at IKEA.

If they are told that there is a connection between Aborigin and Sweden, they may scoff this information or make a good laugh at it. The link between Aborigin and Brits are very logical as the relationship between them made this country came into being. But with Sweden? I think I have to give them a kilogram of weed to eventually make people believe what I say.

One connection between Sweden and Aborigin people in Australia lies in one scientist called Eric Mjöberg. With several colleagues, he led an expedition to Australia in the early 1900s. Initially, Mjöberg and his friends were interested in collecting insects, plants and other animals. Their encounters with indigenous people in Kimberly, Western Australia, have shifted their objectives away from collecting animals and plants to indigenous people. At that time, virus of Darwinism had spread out endemically and Mjöberg was no immune from this. He thought that Aborigine in Australia was an answer to the missing link.

What happened next was rather disturbingly interesting. Mjöberg began to collect Aboriginal remains and might have hoped that these remains would be useful for scientific reason.

More than 90 years later, these remains were returned to Australia by the museum in Sweden that has been keeping the collection of Mjöberg’s remains. Apparently, these bones haven’t been studied and once Mjöberg had to sell them out when he went bankrupt.

Here I am not merely telling the connection between Sweden and Australia. The crux of this posting lies on the function of science for human beings. Since Enlightenment, science has been enjoying a great victory over any other way of gaining knowledge and discovering the truth. Yet, what is more interesting in this story was the link between science and racial superiority. Through science Europeans tried to prove themselves that they are more superior than other people in the planet. Science in this sense contributed to a constructed system of belief upon which Europeans laid their existence.

It is hard to look at this story with our modern ethical codes. For whatever reasons our modern ethics will see what Mjöberg and his friends have done is unethical. If we imagined ourselves living in the same period as Mjöberg, and worked as anthropologist, we may have the same view as him. Even though we disagreed with Darwin theory, the dominant discourse in the realm of science might have influenced the way we see others.

Having talked about this, it brought me to the moment where I was discussing representation, science, race during colonial period. In the class, one archaeology student said that she said it is ethically right to ask dig up the indigenous remains after permission is granted. If we don’t get permission, we won’t force our will. She added that it’s better if scientists digged up the remains and studied them then returned them after they’ve finished. Otherwise, these remains might end up in a black market. Her view reflects clearly how scientists work according to ethical conducts and most importantly how sciences is perceived to be the ultimate way of obtaining the truth.

Yet, what is the benefit for the indigenous people after their ancestors’ bones were studied? Let says, if recent study concluded that one tribe did not belong to certain family, what impact does it have to their existence? Will they have an identity crisis?

The Pink Triangle

Once I read graffiti on the toilet wall at campus and its content shocked me in disgust. The graffiti said that homosexual is fashion. Did he understand that throughout history, homosexual had been harshly treated? Because of this writing on the toilet wall about gay, I decided to write up one grim story of gay during the Nazi.

For popular belief, most of the Nazi victims were Jewish. This argument was not entirely wrong as most Jewish indeed received harsh treatment from the Nazi. Apart from Jewish, Gypsies were also amongst of the Nazi victims (later I’ve learnt that the term Gypsies actually has a derogatory meaning. Sinti or Roma are perceived to be appropriate term. Europeans thought that these nomad people were from Egypt and Gypsie is a modification of that word Egypt). The lives of massive number of Sinti people ended up in the hand of the Nazi and its collaborators.

Since the stories of Sinti and Jewish came to surface, only little did people know about the murder of gay people during the Nazi occupation. Even though, some stories of survivors may have mentioned the life of gay people in concentration camps or elsewhere, it may have been only a fragment of that personal narrative. The hidden story of gay people during the Nazi came out only in the eighties following the gay and lesbian movement. As a result of this more liberated atmosphere, one survivor published his personal account on homosexuals during the Nazi era. From that moment, the stories of gay people in the camps began to unfold.

It was puzzling as well as challenging to see the prosecution of gay during the Nazi era. Hitler as many may understand it was not madly preoccupied with gay as he was with Jewish. We all know that Euthanasia was carried out for elderly and others because they were unfit within the society. Is it because this ideology that was based on politicised body conception so the gay were haunted and sent off to the camps? Isn’t it strange to know that homosexual was pilloried while the Nazi party itself was masculine and homosocial in nature? Isn’t it possible homoerotism appears within homosocial organisation? How did the Nazi characterise gay people as gestures and official records did not give clues at all? Why female homosexuals were not widely targeted as the males? What is also interesting is that we can’t simply put victims and perpetrators paradigm as these gay people were sent to the frontier in order to defend the German military.

What is surely known is that the Nazi used one article in the penal code to proscribe homosexuality. It was known as the article 175 of the German Penal Code. The Nazi did not create this article. Nor did the Nazi insert homophobic passage into it. The article was a legacy of 19th and it was only modified in 1930s.

Prior to the amendment of Article 175, Nazis had already started to purge homosexuals soon after they seized power in 1933. Nazis raided gay pubs and bars as well as Magnus Hirschfeld’s Sexual Science Institute in May 1933. Two years later, the executions of Ernst Röhm and others members of Sturmabteilung (SA), a paramilitary organisation, took place. Ernst Röhm was close to Hitler and helped him a lot in the development of SA. This has been noted as marking the turning point in Nazi policy against homosexuals. The amendment of Article 175 two years later provided a legal basis for continued persecution, and the establishment of The Reich Office for the Combating of Homosexuality and Abortion as part of the Criminal Police reorganisation functioned to register and compile records of homosexuals.

Some Nazi scientists thought that homosexual is sort of disease which could spread and contaminate society. They also maintained that homosexual behaviour is curable and some attempts were therefore carried out to sort this problem out. One of them is castration, which was common within the military. It was believed that after being castrated the deviant sexual urge would decline. At that time, within scientist circle, there was a raging debate over the nature of homosexuality as to whether it was nature or nurture. The nurture paradigm held more sway, nevertheless.

The number of gay held in the camp is difficult to know. One scholar, Lautmann, estimated that around 10.000 alleged homosexuals were found in the camps. While it is widely known how atrocious prisoner conditions were in the camps, for homosexual inmates’ treatment was even worse, from guards as well as other inmates[1]. This is, of course, not suggesting that there is a hierarchy of anguish within the camps or amongst victims of Nazi atrocities. Rather, this discriminatory treatment against homosexual inmates can be seen as reflecting society’s attitudes towards homosexuals outside the camp or in a normal situation. Homosexual inmates were marked with pink triangle to identify them within the camp.

This discrimination stemmed from the view that homosexual men were weak and effeminate, which could undermine the strength of the state. As homosexual men were not contributing to the reproduction process, their non-procreative sexual practice meant an inevitable decrease in the population[2]. Moreover, the Nazi movement was the ultimate manifestation of the Männerbund. Stemming from the eighteen century view, Männerbund prioritises male friendship over other relationships, stressing solidarity and dedication created through male bonding. Yet tension arose from the homosocial concept of Männerbund and the tendency towards homoeroticism. According to Harry Oostehuis, this tension was pushed to extremes during the Nazi anti-gay crusade[3]. George Mosse has an interesting analysis of this tension and its relation to the vilification of homosexuals, suggesting that the ‘otherness’ was necessary to construct Nazi masculinity[4]. In this sense, criminalisation through legal definition of homosexuality enabled a concurrent definition Nazi masculinity by denigrating ‘the other’.

Following the downfall of the Nazi party, the persecution of homosexuals remained a largely untold story, and Article 175 has not yet been repealed until after the reunification of Germany. Even when some survivors of the Nazi campaign began to share their horrific experiences, homosexual survivors remained largely silent due to social and legal stigma. In the post-war period, even within gay and lesbian circles there was a reluctance to talk about experiences of persecution, with majority indicating that they wished to forget about the Nazi period[5]. As the gay and lesbian liberation movement created a more tolerant atmosphere, some attempts were made to bring the hidden effects of Nazi atrocities into the public.

The anti-gay crusade during the Nazi period tells us much about how issues of sexuality are crucial in enriching our understanding of violence. In the case Nazi Germany, discourses on the homosexual experience, whether it be a legal, medical or historical discourse, often function to categorise homosexuals as what we consider ‘the other’. However ambiguous the definition of Article 175, it enabled the Nazi party to significantly impact on homosexual community in Germany, which was perceived as a menace to the social hygiene of Aryan Germany, and as undermining the foundations of masculinity upon which the Männerbund was laid.

[1] Rudiger Lautmann, ‘The Pink Triangle: Homosexuals as “Enemies of The State”, in Michael Berenbaum and Abraham J. Pech (eds), The Holocaust and History: The Known, The Unknown, The Disputed, and The Reexamined, Bloomington and Indianapolis, Indiana University Press, 1998, p. 348.
[2] The argument of population growth and procreative sex re-emerged in the Nazi propaganda against homosexuals. Heinrich Himmler was particularly concerned with the imbalance between the number of homosexuals and the number of those who died during the First World War. He estimated in a speech, that there were two millions homosexuals and two millions deaths of soldiers during World War I which meant, according to Himmler, that four million men were unable to contribute to the population growth. Stümke and Finkler in Michael Burleigh and Wolfgang Wippermann, The Racial State Germany 1933-1945, Cambridge, Cambridge University Press, 1991, pp. 192-193. See also, Robert G Moller, ‘The Homosexual Man Is a 'Man,' the Homosexual Woman Is a 'Woman'": Sex, Society, and the Law in Postwar West Germany’, Journal of the History of Sexuality, Vol. 4, No. 3, Special Issue, Part 2: Lesbian and Gay, Histories. (Jan., 1994), p. 403.
[3] Harry Oosterhuis, ‘Medicine, Male Bonding and Homosexuality in Nazi Germany’, Journal of Contemporary History, Vol. 32, No. 2. (Apr., 1997), p. 205.
[4] Elizabeth D. Heineman, ‘Sexuality and Nazism: The Double Unspeakable?’, Journal of the History of Sexuality, Vol. 11, Nos. 1/2, (January/April 2002), p. 38.
[5] Erik N. Jensen, ‘The Pink Triangle and Political Consciousness: Gays, Lesbians, and the Memory of Nazi Persecution’, Journal of the History of Sexuality, Vol. 11, No. 1/2, (January/April 2002), p. 321.

Reog: sexuality in Indonesia

As this blog is dedicated to history of sexuality, I feel bad that I haven’t written anything about sexuality in Indonesia. Only here and there, I alluded to sexual mores in the archipelago.

There is one particular topic that I’d like to post here. It’s about Reog, cultural practice in a small town of eastern part of Java, Ponorogo. Reog is a traditional dance which involves a number of people. In Reog, there is a man wearing a massive demonic looking mask which is weight approximately 50 kg and held between his teeth. This dancer is called the Lion King. Another performance is called Warok. Usually this warok is dressed in black and is believed to have a magical prowess.

Traditionally, warok engaged in same-sex relationship because they fear of loosing their supernatural power if they have sexual encounter with females. Warok’s partner is called gemblak who is having effeminate gestures. For our modern conception of sexuality, this same sex companionship between two males has homosexual tendency. But for people in Ponorogo where this tradition is proudly practices, the same sex desire between warok and his partner is not homosexual matter.

Warok’s partner is normally younger and is chosen around the neighbourhood area. The procedure of choosing gemblak is very interesting as it has similarity to wedding ceremony. Delegation is sent by warok to the home of the boy and put forward the proposal to the parents’ boy. As Ian Wilson noted, there is economic benefit of being a partner for warok. Once the boy is chosen and agreed to the proposal, the warok is responsible for his needs including education. For the boys and their poor families, being a companion of warok is giving them social prestige as well as protection since warok is considered as strong man the village. Of course any proposal can be rejected by parents if they don’t concur.

Interestingly, although gemblak engaged in same-sex relationship with another man, it does not mean his sexuality is doomed to be homosexual. Later when gemblak is entering a more mature stage, warok will actively involve in finding a future wife for him. Likewise, marriage for warok is not entirely out of question. Yet a step to marriage would be taken when the power of warok is fully developed and this usually happens around forties.

At the moment, I am reading a book called The Gay Archipelago by an American anthropologist, Tom Boellstorff. According to him, it is difficult to trace history of sexuality in Indonesia as written documents are scarce. Even in colonial government archives, homosexuality in the archipelago was not recorded. It is interesting why the Dutch authority did not impose Victorian values upon the society. Although banning was imposed but it wasn’t on the ground of breaching a normative sexual mores, it was because of its potentially political threat as the dance could attract many people.

It is interesting why these people do not consider this same-sex relationship as homosexual. Homosexuality as a sexual category is a modern invention, coined in the late 19th century. Prior to that invention, there were terms reffered to homosexuality but only denoted the sexual practice rather than sexual identity. Only after the trial of Oscar Wilde, there was a growing awareness amongst gay people about their social position and identity.

I think it is understandable if these people do not perceive the same-sex relationship as homosexual. How could they reconcile traditional and modern concepts of sexuality? Once they accept this categorisation then the next thing would be shifting the sexual mores that underpins that categorisation.

*pictures are taken from the web of Petra University in Surabaya and wikipedia.

Pretty Little Thing

I received an email about NYT coverage of female circumcision (FC) in Indonesia. I heard this practice before. But I heard this from small talks with my neighbours or friends in Indonesia. It might have been written in media but unfortunately this news may have been out of my knowledge.

After I read the whole story from NYT, curiosity pushed in and dragged me into google search engine and found several reports on female circumcision in Indonesia. It’s bewildering me to read the story of this cutting-off female genital practice and the reasons why there is a need to take a bit of female organ. As we may have known, female circumcision can be found in African countries, Malaysia and Indonesia.

With the growing awareness of human rights and women’s issues, female circumcision is now becoming a huge concern and is able to draw attention from many parts of society and responded to the matter differently. As alarming as it appears, the global health organisation, WHO and UNICEF put female genital mutilation into their campaign programmes. Likewise, foreign aid organisations such USAID supported topic-related researches in the countries where this practice take place. Academics also show their interests in this discourse and the topic is soon becoming the main theme in the journals of various disciplines.

From what I researched so far, female circumcision in Indonesia fits into type IV within WHO categorisation as it shows below:

Unclassified, which includes: pricking, piercing or incising of the clitoris and/or labia; stretching of the clitoris and/or labia; cauterization by burning of the clitoris and the surrounding tissue; scraping of tissue surrounding the vaginal orifice ('angurya' cuts) or cutting of the vagina ('gishiri cuts'); introduction of corrosive substances or herbs into the vagina to cause bleeding or for the purposes of tightening or narrowing it; and any other procedure that falls under the definition of FGM given above.

A research by Population Council suggests that FC in Indonesia falls into type IV and it is done for religious and traditional belief purposes. Their work, which was aided by USAID and gained support from the minister of health and academics, is very interesting. Its conclusion is contesting the popular belief, which may be suggesting the pivotal role of the Islam doctrines in the practice, arguing that tradition is the rationale behind this practice.

“Parents and religious leaders alike were found to have no significant knowledge on the formal links between FC and Islam. We can conclude that the practice of FC in Indonesia is essentially a tradition which has been passed from one generation to the next with little questioning about its meaning or its basis in Islamic history or law. Many adhere to, and pass down, this tradition simply because elders and grandparents wish to preserve this practice in the younger generations".

If it is generally said that ‘cutting-off’ female clitoris is part of religious duty. However, people will differ in their opinions about female circumcision and would be more likely to broadly interpret the Islamic doctrines that rule this matter.

Similarly, clerics could disagree amongst themselves as to whether FC is obligatory or commendable. Yet, the more likely scenario is that nodding gesture is given when these clerics are asked if female circumcision is harmless. The practices itself differ from one another. Some will involve piercing or incising of the clitoris and some will do it symbolically such as rubbing turmeric on to it.

It is also important to note that this practice typically occurs in the village rather than in the cities. In this respect, it is, therefore, very inviting to take this discussion into modern versus traditional framework. Yet, I don’t subscribe this sort of theorisation as it only allows me to see this in very patronising way. Even if the pace of modernisation quickened in the villages, particularly in the field of medicine and health, it does not necessarily lead to shifting cultural values and practices. As the reports strikingly found, the practices are medicalised, involving more health care practitioners with modern knowledge. Medicalisation presupposes that such practice is more justifiable if it is done by more knowledge of hygienic standards.

Having read this, we might think that this practice is typically non-western tradition. In fact, female genital mutilation occurred during 19th century. According to an archivist and historian, Lesley Hall, an English doctor Isaac Baker Brown carried out ‘unknown number of clitoridectomies’ in order to cure a prevalent masturbation. In modern days America, a surgery is conducted on girls who have large clitoris. The reason behind this operation is to ‘normalise’ the gender. Large clitoris could be similar to penis and having it reduced means that the girls’ genitals are appropriated with their gender.

However dissimilar in its forms, female circumcision in Indonesia and African countries as well as clitoropasty in the US suggest that women’s bodies are a site of battles for society and its culture upon which dominant values can be imposed.

Birthday is not an Asian thing!

Q: What you are gonna do on your birthday?
A: I don’t know. Maybe I’ll be having BBQ at my place.

Q: What are doing on your birthday?
A: I have no idea really. I am thinking of having a nice dinner at the restaurant

Q: Do you have any plan for your birthday?
A: Shite! My birthday was a week ago.

Birthday never used to be a big thing when I was living in Jakarta. As cultural practice, celebrating birthday in Asia is associated with middle classes who embrace modern culture, or western culture. In contrast, lower classes can’t afford to have a party and might put aside the idea of making one particular day special. For them, there are too many things that are far more important than spending sometime with family and friends on birthday. Having spent seven or six days a week at work, leisure time is hardly available for them.

When I was a kid, I was rarely invited by friends who celebrated birthday. I remember when I was in high school, only affluent people circulated cutely decorated birthday invitation in the class or close friends. Sometimes my friends and I did not come as we didn’t have any idea of appropriate presents for the birthday boy or girl. As a kid, it is nothing worse than turning up at birthday party without any presents.

Likewise, within the family, no one would get offended if every one forgets about the birthday of one family member. I’ve never received any birthday card from my uncle or aunties. My parents often did not remember even if they did, we never expected any gifts. More than once, I got up in the morning and realised that I missed my own birthday but it didn’t sadden me.

When i was nearly twenty, usually the birthday girl/boy had to shout everyone. It could be food or drinks, or even both. The birthday person can go to a restaurant or buy some take away food then eating them up at home with friends and families.

Birthday as part of festivity in our culture derived from Dutch settlers who occupied the country for more than three hundred years. Not only did colonisers bring their cultural practices but they also changed the calendar system, replacing traditional and Arabic with the Gregorian. These two calendars do not entirely disappear in modern days but they are put together with Gregorian one for those who still practice tradition.

There is one celebration related to birth in Indonesia but as far as my recollection is correct. But it is based on Javanese calendar rather than Gregorian. Usually, my grandma would prepare a plate of fruit and traditional cakes and put it in her room. I didn’t really know what was the purpose. She just told me that she did it for someone’s birthday.

Since I’ve been living in Australia birthday party becomes part of my ritual of modern culture. I get number of birthday invitations from friends. In return, they want me to make 10th of February is special for me. I do like this sort of celebration and appreciate any efforts they made to cheer me up on my birthday. However, sometimes I feel like going out somewhere on my own, wandering around the city and doing nothing special. I thought people were born in this world alone and birthday could be a perfect moment to contemplate about life.

Jamie Oliver or Gordon Ramsay or Spew-it-all perhaps?

Never did i think cooking become so popular tv show. Before it was only few cooking shows on the television and all the prime time was taken over by soapies. But now, cooking shows begin to outnumber soapies and its popularity seems to emulate reality tv. Popularity does not equate to quality. Audience can freely choose which cooking shows that magically force them to skip dinner time.

Nigella Lawson is one of them. She looks great as a person: sexy, charming and stunning. Yet, the message of the show does not seem to get passed on. It is obviously cooking show where food, sauce pan, frying pan, and whisk should be on the shot. But why is it, the camera is always shooting at her boobs rather than mashed potato? Dolly Parton in the kitchen? Not sure if this will work. We can't blame all on the dirty perve cameraman. She also likes to give an erotic gesture. The way she talks and moves are sort of like sexy ads screened during non-kids-presence time. "Call me" as if she tries to say.

With his sweet and gentle gestures, Jamie Oliver, who is having an affair with his veggie patches, is one of favourite chef for many. His show is representing a great image of a father-should-be or perhaps a boyfriend-should-be. His food is always simple yet its simplicity seems to promise you a pleasant experience for your tastebud. It is perfect for making your home kitchen vibrant and warm. I found him a bit overrated. The images of Jamie's kitchen seems to be far from reality. Kitchen is not always like that, even at home.

A highly qualified and three Michelin starred chef, Gordon Ramsay show is an antipode to sweetness of Jamie and Nigella's kitchens. Kitchen is a hell to be. Swearing, bullying, and crying are scenes that you are more likely to see in his show. Ramsay is an interesting character. His precious experience requires him to set up the standard very high. His distinguished record does not seem to impact on his communication skills, however.

Iron Chef is very entertaining. Three professional chefs with their different expertise have to accept the challenge from other chefs. To see how these chefs competing to create food out of the chosen theme is amazing. The show reveals more about culinary art and every time i watch it, i feel like watching if three realist artists abandoned their canvases, paints and brushes and ended up working with tongs and knife in the kitchen.

Spew-it-all. He is not like all these people, not even the slightest thing. He has no boobs like Nigella. Nor is he sweet like Jamie. Only his frequent swearing is perhaps the similiarity you can get from comparing him and Ramsay. He won't look good in Iron Chef's outfits. Although very avarage in most aspects, he has passion for food, nevertheless. Once he made this pan seared trout with orange based salsa for his girl. It worked well. The size is the only criticism that he received (i thought i was not cooking for inmate!).

Healing the Wound

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it", George Santayana.

To say sorry is always a nice thing. It means that we have a humility to recognise any mistake that we've made. Without this humble recognition, it would be hard to build a better future as we are vulnerable to trap into the same mistake. However, it is not easy as it sounds to say sorry. Once we said it, we are taking the position on which we stand and we are no longer innocent. We are therefore acknowledging our guilt. This is perhaps what makes people reluctant to say sorry when they've made mistakes. No one wants to be feeling guilty as it may change peoples' view on themselves.

The Australian government's plan to say sorry to indigenous community for what has happened in the past is sort of humility. For a long time, the Aboriginal communities, human rights activists and like-minded people have been working really hard to put pressure on the government to say sorry to Aboriginal people.

In the past, aboriginal children were taken away from their parents by the government to be fostered out to white families. Some of parents could maintain a contact with their beloved ones but more likely there were large number of parents who had no clue on their children's whereabouts. Removing the children from their families is like pulling something down its root. The children have to give up most of their cultural identities. They were not allowed to talk with their own language, to have their traditional belief, and to contact the families. When they grew up, most part of their cultural identities disapperear.

The Stolen Generation is the name for children who grew up during that grim period. One of my history lecturer told me the reason why stolen generation was chosen over, for instance, lost generation. It signifies the struggle so that someday aboriginal society could regain it again.

Some might argue that it is inappropriate to ask the current goverment to say sorry for what happened in the past as the current government did not involve in that event. It is true that the horror took place before us. However, it is important to remember that the existence of the contemporary society and goverment can not be separated from the past. This is not to say that the nation moved forward linearly. Rather, it shows that the past and the present are inextricably linked. To forget the wound that the Australian government cause on its society, means to accept that the flawed morality once became the ground of the nation.

13 February 2008 will be an important date for Australians. Officially, the new Prime Minister Kevin Rudd will apologise to Aboriginal people. It will a historical moment and important remedy for the wound of the nation.

Below is a lyric of the song Took The Children Away by Archie Roach, an aboriginal singer who was taken away when he was a child.


This story's right, this story's true
I would not tell lies to you
Like the promises they did not keep
And how they fenced us in like sheep
Said to us come take our hand
Set us up on mission land
They taught us to read, to write and pray
Then they took the children away
Took the children away
The children away

Snatched from their mother's breast
Said this is for the best
Took them away
The welfare man, the policeman
Said you've got to understand
Cos' we'll give to them what you can't give
And teach them how to really live
Teach them how to live they said
Humiliated them instead
And they taught them that and taught them this
And others taught them prejudice

Oh took the children away
Oh the children away
Breaking their mothers heart
Tearing us all apart
Took them away

One dark day on Framlingham
Came and did not give a damn
My mother cried go get their dad
He came running, fighting mad
Mother's tears were falling down
And my Dad shaped up and stood his ground.
He said you touch my kids and you gotta fight me boys

Then they took us from our family.
Took us away
Yeah took us away
Grabbed from our mother's breast
Said this is for the best
Took us away.

Told us what to do and say
Taught us all these are white man's ways
But then they split us up again
Gave us gifts to ease the pain
Sent us off to foster homes
And as we grew up oh we felt alone
Cause we were acting white
And feeling black
One sweet day all the children came back

Yeah the children came back
Yeah the children came back
Back where their hearts grow strong
Back where they all belong
The children came back
Said the children came back
Oh the children came back
Back where they understand
Back to their mother's land
The children came back
Back to their mother
Back to their father
Back to their sister
Back to their brother
Back to their people
Back to their land
All the children came back
All the children came back
Yeah the children came back
Yes I came back.

New Look!

I played around with templates and ended up having my comments disappeared! Not good really. But haloscan is getting a bit annoying. It takes one century for new comment to be up. Well, decision has to be made and here is mine: i will keep this new look and sacrifice my comments--albeit i miss reading them.

On the weekend, i was unrealistically happy. For a long time i have been waiting to see The Police concert and that night my wait was over. Three genius men rocked Melbourne and pampered their fans' ears with syncopated reggae beat of their songs. In short, it was awesome. 'Message in the Bottle', 'Every little thing she does is magic', 'Roxanne', you name any of their songs that sat on the top chart, they sang it.

I will post some more soon! Have been busy to write an article for online magazine.

Nymphomania

If we ask random people on the street this question: what do you call a woman who sleeps with many men?, the most likely answer would be a slut. Sometimes we might hear the word nymphomania mentioned. These days, we tend to hear less that fancy word nymphomania than slut when it comes to describing female sexual behaviour.

There is a huge different in term of meaning between slut and nymphomania. Slut is a social label which is used to denote sexual libertine females. Sometimes it is used in parallel with prostitutes. On the other hand, as fancy it may sound, nymphomania is scientific word ascribed to an excess of sexual desire in female. Nymphomania was categorised as disease rather than merely deviant sexual behaviour. Despite this difference, still there is a tendency to confuse these two words in every day use.

In nineteenth century during which a conservative sexual mores prevailed, nymphomania became a huge concern for the newly emerging medical science. Many works were dedicated to diagnose such thing. Medical science worked within the nature of male chauvinist perspective. As a result, female sexual behaviours were analysed and then constructed according to males’ vision on female. Although, science back then recognised male’s overindulgence on sex, which was called satyriasis, only female sexual behaviours that was perceived as menacing the existing values. Interestingly confusion was found within medical experts as to what constituted nymphomania. Many experts had different definitions on nymphomania. Nevertheless, the concept of nymphomania constructed by medical science was able to produce ‘the truth’ about women.

According to historian, Carol Groneman, who studied the term nymphomania in nineteenth century Europe, “the concept of nymphomania constructs a female sexuality that is totally out of control, both literally and figuratively: out of the control of their husbands, mothers, and doctors; and out of the control of the "natural laws" that supposedly determined women's passive response to male desire” . In an interview with salon.com, Groneman explained that the term is not “defining anything real”.

As the time went on, the relation between men and women has changed. It is relatively equal than what happened in nineteenth century or to be precise, more opportunities are open up for women to compete with their opposite sex. Similarly, the conception itself has changed. Instead of tagging women with a huge lust nympho, people favour a sort of general term: sexually active.

Despite this change, it’s not that easy for women to sleep around or to have a frequent fiddle in order to release their sexual urges. Society, to some extent, still sees sexually active women in a very subjugating manner. The expression, ‘only a slut who sleeps with a lot of men’ is often accepted as truth.

The C-Word

My name is a CUNT! So simple. Every one can find me where I am. I am located down under the women’s bellies and it is adjacent to my friend rectum. It’s basically not a great spot for me but being in between two thighs offers me sort of protection.

I am not called that way everyday. It’s only in certain circumstance my name is allowed to say. Sometimes my name CUNT is mentioned during a vigorous and raunchy sex. But not in every sex as the sound of it may be a turn-off for some who are comfortable with old-romance-style of sex. Certain ages can’t say my name either. It is extremely taboo for them to say it. So it’s not a word for kids, say adults the rule-creators. It’s the worst language in English language. Actually I have different names other than CUNT. But my other names have different meanings for those who are using it. When they’re a bit polite and curious, I am then called VAGINA, which supposedly doesn’t carry an offensive meaning. VULVA is another name that is used in a very different manner. Another time, I am called PUSSY. I don’t really know exactly (not even more and less) what is the connection between a name for a kitten and genital. Only context rules out our similarity, I suppose.

My name CUNT can be barometer for people. When people are using it, the others will suggest what kind of emotional state the speakers are at. Sometimes the use of my name CUNT is related to social background. The more people say it, the more likely they get labelled uncultured. This is the worst part that I don’t really like. My name CUNT is used and given a bad meaning. When a person is called a CUNT means he/she is really bad, awful and disgraceful. I am not sure why do I get this meaning. Is it because of my look? I don’t think my look is that bad. Women can be proud of having me and men can be crazy for me. So why is it, my name is used to describe something really terrible. In different context, my name can also be used as term of endearment. Ah you are such a funny cunt! But again it still implies vulgarity. They loathe me and love me at the same time.

I am certain that I am not the ugliest and grossest organ in human body. People will hear their lovers are caling me beautiful. Contrasting to others organ, I have the appeal. But still that doesn’t change anything. If it is because the location where I am at, I don’t think that is entirely the case. Not all organs in the easiest spot to see such as face are having attention.Beautiful eyes, gorgeous legs, nice boobs, sexy lips, excellent hair, and so on. Never did I hear people commenting on ears. Wow, that girl has fantastic ears! What? I know the perception of beauty encompasses any aesthetical aspects experiencing by the viewers. But with ears are different! People are less likely to have experienced a delirium aesthetical satisfaction with ears than they have with me.I deserve more than them.

So far I can only complain. I can’t make appeal to reconsider my name CUNT to be removed from vulgar category in English language.

Little Surprise

Christmas is over! Yay! Frankly, it was tiring to catch up with family. Apart from one hour journey, to make conversation with cousins, uncle, and aunts can be hard. Of course it's always easy if you get along with them. But if you don't, it could be unbearably difficult. Sometimes you have one or two people in the family who are up themselves, thinking that they are fuckin' fabulous and should therefore be modeled. If they are not talking about themselves, they will brag about their kids. Anyway it's over now and time to move on! The novelty of listening to John Butler Trio's new album can surely remind me that there is a little joy at least in Christmas!

After finished working, i decided to drop by at the Asian groceries in the city. I need some spices and bottled chili sauce. The supermarket is great. It has a good varieties of Asian stuffs. Only the design is the downside of it. The shelves are build too high as high as those shelves in the state library. I thought it is funny to think that Asians are not known for having a big figure. Their average heights are not more than 160 cm.

When I walked between two tall shelves of drinks, my eyes caught a blue bottle sitting nicely in RTD (Ready To Drink) shelf where dozens of Japanese rice wine are stored. The drink is called "Tsunami" and what's more is the words underneath the name: "Big Wave of Flavour". First reaction was only smile as i could not think of any response. Strangely, the day i found this drink coincided with the date when Tsunami took place several years ago. It was Boxing Day. I am not sure what is the connection of the date when Tsunami happened and my unexpected encounter with this drink. I will leave this to clairvoyance as i don't like taking others peoples jobs. So i took one and walked to the counter.

Some might say that any moment can be interpreted as texts and reading that texts could lead us to various meaning. For hundred of thousands survivors, the disastrous wave does not have any exciting flavour but desperation, grim, grief, poignancy which stay at their life. That's perhaps what they think about the Tsunami. But for this South Australia based company which produces this drink, the meaning of tsunami is twisted, this sparkling lychee flavoured supposedly is offering a great challenge to your palate. Fear and anguish will not wash you away as the wave does. But only a great wave of flavour will as the message tries to say. Convincingly!

Tonight, the whole world will celebrate the arrival of the new year. As celebration is often associated with alcohol, this drink, if it still available, may be a good company to jazz the night up.

Anyway, i'd like to wrap this up by wishing everyone happy new year and all the best! I hope you will get a big wave of excitement and luck!