Clitoholic

I am inspired to write this dialog model post after reading Captain Smack posting which featured conversation between Jesus and Elvis on midget.


One day, Dickhead, a linguistic student got nothing to do during break. He has to wait for another 3 hours for next lecture. So he decided to go to the bar. Soon he arrived there, he ordered a schooner of beer and grabbed a magazine from the rack. Before reading the mag, he took his Champion Ruby out of his pocket and made a nice one roll of cigarette. His reading time was disrupted by Shithead who sit down next to him.

Shithead: "How are you mate?" Got any class today?

Dickhead: "Not too bad. Will have one in the afternoon."

Shithead: "What are you reading?" Oh no, it's crap mag. Put it away and you look so serious reading that shit."

Shithead was curious to know what makes him so serious.

Shithead: "Are you reading about sex section?"

Dickhead: "This one is interesting, you know. It's about a girl who is complaining about her boyfriend's habit during foreplay."

Shithead: "Foreplay is always interesting, isnt it?. But what makes this one deserve your attention?. Is it your girlfriend sending the letter?"

Dickhead: "No. But listen, this girl is telling that her boyfriend always goes down straight to her clitoris when they are about to start as though her body is not worth stimulation."

Shithead: "Won't blame him though. He perhaps believes that clitoris is the centre of women pleasure."

Dickhead: "Yeah, but i am thinking there might be a name for this kind of habit, you know".

Shithead: "What do you mean?"

Dickhead: "Well, like kleptomania, alcoholic and so on. If there is no term for it, it should be made up. These days people are making up new words, but they seem to forget to make this one. We have hoover, blogsphere, shagathon, and upskirting."

Shithead: "Easy, just add compound then it becomes new word, doesnt it? Like Clitmania or whatever.

Dickhead: "Clitmania might confuse with Kleptomania."

After pause for a while. Dickhead shouts.

Dickhead: "Eureka! How about clitoholic? Sounds good, doesn't it?. It is like shopaholic and alcoholic.

Shithead: "Wow, that is a good one. You are brilliant! Anyway, i was wondering if there is a name for a person who is fetishising broccoli. So the name will be broccoholic. It is like a movie title you know, Erin Broccoholic. And it's good for surname too."

Dickhead: "It is Erin Brockovich, you shithead!".

Shithead: "Oh well, maybe they're gonna make the parody version of it, like Emma Broccoholic or something. Hey...maybe we can make another one. In my gender studies class, we talk about MILF. You know, MILF is now becoming the subject of study especially after celebs having babies they are still trying to look sexually attractive."

Dickhead: "Mmm yummy mummy. I think for that one, Milfology is the most appropriate term."

Shithead: "Shit, that's awesome!". We should write that on our t-shirt. Let's do it now, i have a texter in my bag."

On Shithead t-shirt, Dickhead writes the word MILFOLOGY. After he finished and was satisfied, he asked Shithead to write CLITOHOLIC on his t-shirt.